{WELL HELLO THERE!}

So ya. Hi! This post might be a bit wordy, so prepare yourself now!

I'm really not avoiding this blog. Promise. I have some good and valid reasons.

My laptop battery pooped out mid recovery. It sucked. But im happy shes back. My dear old friend is back.lol

My jeep pooped out too (manufacturers mistake i guess). But again, shes back. And im ever so thankful for warranties. That bill would have eaten us alive. $200 is better than over $1000.

My car, im afraid is on its last leg. Shes not lasting as long as i need her to. Say some prayers for her. I cant afford 2 vehicle payments at a time. Poor thing has seen some action. Shes protected some precious cargo. Shes been through alot. Shes been lived in, she brought my baby home from the hospital, shes gotten my Kreg to and from work, shes moved me more times than i would like to remember. Shes nearly 10 years old. Her time has come. And has put up with yearly oil changes, sometimes 2 year oil changes. Really shes done her job. But she just needs to last! She needs new shocks, new brakes, new oil, new lubrication, new filters, new belts, and so much more. Just say a prayer for her.

My back surgery happened. Second one. Yep. Great amounts of fun i tell ya. February 4th, and i came home on the 5th. It was beyond wonderful not to have to stay more than one night in the hospital. Last time i think it was something like 4 days? I'm still not sure.
It was nice to have that break, but nice to get back home.
And this time we were incredibly blessed with Kreg able to be home to care for me. He had 2 weeks off (but had nearly another week he could have taken if needed) and it was, well, wonderful. Even though my back had been operated on and all, it was wonderful to have him there. I cant even tell you.
8 years together and i still long for him, i still physically need him there beside me at times, i still get giddy when we still little moments of the day together and just talk or hold hands. It was nice, it was sweet. We napped together, both of us snoring in sync and slobbering in sweet peace. It was what i needed to feel better. I needed that time with him, i needed his comfort and sweetness, but i also had moments of him needing to tell me to "Buck up".
Ive always said and felt that Kreg's presence calms me, it helps me deal with things, and pain. And i firmly believe that by having him there i was able to take minimal (if any at all) pain meds. Which was a HUGE relief to me. And to my doctor. He was pretty stunned that 2 weeks post op i had barely taken my pain meds and wasn't asking for more. He was shocked that i was ready to resume my life so quickly.

I love my doctor, i will be sure to pay his bill on time and in full because i love him so much. I will use him from now on if any further back issues arise. He uses minimally evasive procedures, and he leads Utah as well as the nation in doing the procedure he used on me.
He was supportive of me, was so incredibly kind, and didnt make rude comments about my weight. He's a no nonsense kind of guy and i like that. I appreciate the fact that he got me back to my life in 2-3ish weeks, verses 3ish months (plus some). And he didn't force me to wear a ridiculous girdle or use the toilet seat lifter. Ya, i so went there. Toilet seat lifter people, it sucks! Hello cold piece of plastic. Gives me alot to look forward to in being old.

On the subject of Kreg, while he was off work, his duties entailed being mom, dad, taxi, bill keeper, doctor, and husband. And he did a dang good job. Better than i hoped. The dishes were taken care of, laundry was done, Klaire was where she needed to be, her work was taken care of, and the list goes on.
On the first day or two off he made the comment of:
"Oh! This is such a piece of CAKE!!"
And to that, my reply was:
"In a few weeks, we'll talk more bub".
And sure enough, by the time the 2 weeks was over, he was ready to return to work! It was pretty funny. Not so easy. Eh!

When Klaire was a baby i learned a really valuable lesson in parenting and marriage.
I DON'T NEED TO BE THE ONE ALWAYS DOING EVERYTHING!! It wears me out and it makes him feel like an outsider of he family. Kreg WANTS to do certain things, he enjoys it, he wants to be a part of it. And i had to teach myself to step back, and let him take the reigns sometimes. Ya, it was hard because he wouldn't do it "my way" or like how i thought it should be done. But you know what? Klaire is perfectly fine, she loves her dad, appreciates him, as do i, and we have gained a greater respect for him. And he hasn't burned our house down yet.
It also lets Kreg appreciate what i do, we share the burdens and try to help each other the best we can.
Little did i know that 7-8 years ago, making myself step back and letting him step in more would be what has made our life work so well now. I couldnt have gotten through these last 3 years had i not done that. Everything worked just so seamlessly and perfect. And as Klaire gets older, its benefiting her to have her dad play an equal role in her life as i do. Its nice not to be going through all this alone.

Lastly, about my surgery, i have to thank my ward. Really, they are such a fantastic group of folks. I cant tell you how much i appreciate each and every one of them.
I wish i had this ward growing up, i would have stayed active in the church. I was on the very brink of leaving the church for good 6 summers ago, and this ward is what has helped me learn some valuable things about life and Heavenly Father. They helped me get over a hurdle, many hurdles in fact. *THEY* are the reason we were brought back to Layton.

Ive said before and I'll say it again, there's a reason why we moved where we did. The Lord knew my struggles to come, and He knew i would need *THIS* ward. He knew of all the special people in it, He knew they would assume the position of family in our lives. He knew they would help us raise Klaire in the Gospel.
They have prayed with and for us.
They have given us countless meals for weeks at a time.
They have given me the opportunity to serve them.
They have loved my daughter.
They have taught me, taught Klaire, and taught Kreg.
They have cheered us on, and reigned us back in when we needed it.
They have shared my struggle with infertility, and some of the R.S. women have shared some very intimate moments of infertility with me, shared some tears, both sad and happy.
They have shared what its like for Kreg to work the hours he does. Certain family members don't seem to get what his schedule is like and what that means for us as a family.
They have helped me feel a little less alone when Kreg's schedule doesn't permit for me to participate in R.S. things or when hes not able to come to church.
They have let me snuggle their babies for hours on end and soak up that sweet baby goodness.
They have shown me that i *AM* good enough to live this Gospel.
They have let me teach them and share what Ive learned in this life.
They have opened up their homes to us when our family was too busy in their life to share the holidays with us.
They are the ones who have urged me to give certain family members another chance to redeem themselves and to forgive.
How can i thank them appropriately? I dont think i can. And that is a little slice of the beauty i find in this church and the Gospel.


So, i guess in the end. I really couldn't have gotten through November till now with out Kreg, Klaire, the Gospel, a whole lotta prayers and blessings, and our ward members. Really, they have been whats pulled us/me through.
Im incredibly blessed, and the Lord has shown that to me over and over. Ya, my back has issues, my health sucks. But nonetheless, im blessed daily, and im incredibly thankful for that. His blessings are rich and bountiful!

I promise, now that im fixed (for now), ill do a better job of posting and updating. I also have my laptop back now, so itll be tons easier.lol
I have TONS and TONS of pics to post too. ;)